On my own
by LegyLuva
Summary: [Complete] A little song fic about Frodo leaving for the undying lands, using the song 'On my own' from Les Mis. No Slash. Sam's point of view added.
1. On my Own

Hello. This is my second song fic on here but my only Frodo/Sam fic that isn't a poem. I hope you all enjoy it and I hope that it is as successful as my previous song fic. Thank to everyone who reviewed that for me. 

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Disclaimer: I own nothing. Zilch. Not a thing. So don't hate me. Frodo and Sam belong to the wonderful Tolkein and 'On my own' is from a brilliant musical called Les Mis. 

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Summary: A little song fic from both Sam and Frodo's point of view. This first chapter is from Frodo and Sam will follow soon. It is set just before Frodo leaves for the undying lands and Sam's will be just after. So here goes:

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On My Own

Frodo was sitting in his room. He had made up his mind and now was the time to say his last Goodbyes. The ring tormented him even now, after it had been destroyed. He could no longer stay here with his nightmares haunting him and although he hated to leave behind the good things, the bad things were too dark to cope with.

After days of thinking over his idea to sail to the undying lands Frodo had finally decided that it was for the best. He would miss his Sam and he knew Sam would miss him, but he could not stay a moment longer. 

The thing that unnerved Frodo the most was the fact that he would be alone. He would no longer have Sam to care for him. For most of his life Sam had been there by his side, and to not have that any longer, it felt like someone had taken away his comfort blanket. He would miss Sam with all his heart but he could not stay and he knew Sam would understand. 

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And now I'm all alone again no where to turn, no one to go to

Without a home without a friend without a face to say hello to

And now the night is near, I can make believe he is here

Sometimes I walk alone at night when everybody else is sleeping

I think of him and then I'm happy with the company I'm keeping

The city goes to bed and I can live inside my head

Frodo was thinking of all the things he and Sam had gone through during their lives. They had experienced more than most ever would and still Sam had stood beside him throughout it all. Their long walks together were over, their midnight talks finished but Frodo had his memories and they would last forever. Making this decision was the hardest thing Frodo had every done but he knew it was the right one. 

Frodo would always have Sam in his heart and hopefully that would be enough. Sam would never forget Frodo and Frodo would never forget Sam. They would each remember the other in everything they saw and did. Never would the other leave them alone. Haunt them, almost. 

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On my own, pretending he's beside me

All alone I walk with him till morning

Without him I feel his arms around me

And when I loose my way I close my eyes and he has found me

In the rain the pavement shines like silver

All the lights are misty in the river

In the darkness the trees are full of starlight

And all I see is him and me forever and forever

Frodo knew that from now on he would be on his own. He would no longer be able to tell Sam all his troubles and rely on him to be by his side in difficult times. He knew that Sam would now only exist with his mind and heart and after they had said Goodbye they would probably never see each other again. That was the hardest thing to comprehend. A life without Sam was so much different to the one he had lived. A life without Sam was full of troubles he didn't think he could cope with. 

The undying lands were beautiful, peaceful places but Frodo was still finding it hard to think of a trouble free life. Especially a trouble free life if Sam was in it. The world was full of dark places and people and Frodo didn't know whether he could cope without his light that was Sam. 

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And I know it's only in my mind

That I'm talking to myself and not to him

And although I know that he is blind

Still I say that there is a way for us

I love him but when the night is over

He is gone the river's just a river

Without him the world around me changes

The trees are there and everywhere the streets are full of strangers

Sam had helped Frodo cope with the death of his parents and the move from his home to his Uncle Bilbo's. Sam had helped him to find some of the happiness that really did exist in the world. Some of the happiness that Frodo had never seen before. 

Frodo had decided that, as much as he would miss Sam, he couldn't cope with these tormenting memories any longer. He had made up his mind and if he didn't do it now he never would. He loved Sam as though he were a brother to him, but he had to leave. 

He took one last look around his room and walked quietly from it, closing the door firmly behind him. 

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I love him but everyday I'm lonely

All my life I've only been pretending

Without me his world will go unturning

A world that's full of happiness that I have never known

Hope you liked it. Please please let me know what you think in a review. All reviews are very very welcome. Thank to everyone who reads this. 


	2. Haunting Memories

Hi. Thank you all for your very kind reviews to the first chapter of this song fic. Hope you enjoyed it. Here is the second chapter from Sam's point of view. The song used is called 'My immortal' by Evanescence. A very beautiful song. I hope this does it justice. Here goes...

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Haunting Memories

Sam opened the door to Frodo's room slowly and silently, as if hoping not to disturb what lay inside. He walked over to the small bed and lay down on top of the many blankets and covers. He hadn't left this room long ago but he always found it hard to drag himself away. Sam missed Frodo so much and although he understood why he could not stay, he wished that they could be together still. He had his Rosie now and he would never have forgiven himself if Frodo had lived with the torment just to please him, but he missed his company. 

Frodo and Sam had been friends for years. They had grown up together and now it felt as though part of him was missing. Frodo's room had been kept the same as it was the day he had left and Sam loved to come and lie in here to recall happy memories that they had both shared. Sometimes it felt as though Frodo was still in the room with him. Still there haunting him. 

To Sam, it sounded too cruel to use the word 'haunt' but that was what it felt like. Everywhere Sam went it felt as though Frodo was still there beside him and sometimes he didn't know if it was a good thing or a bad thing. 

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I'm so tired of being here

Suppressed by all of my childish fears

And if you have to leave

I wish that you would just leave

Because your presence still lingers here

And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase

Sam had been recalling all the happy memories they had shared as well as all the unhappy ones. Sam had always felt the need to protect Frodo and he would have easily given his life if it meant Frodo would be safe. In return, Frodo had been a wonderful friend to Sam. He had always been there when Sam had needed him and Sam had never felt alone whilst Frodo was there. Now it felt as though a piece of him left when Frodo had sailed away and Sam was finding it hard to cope. 

Throughout their lives they had needed each other but Frodo had never needed Sam more than during the quest to destroy the ring. Sam had watched as Frodo fought with the ring's power, tried to overcome it as it slowly ate away at him. Sam had had to stand and watch and yet still he would rather go through all that again and have Frodo with him than be here alone, without him. 

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When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you scream I'd fight away all of your fears

And I've held your hand through all of these years

But you still have all of me

Sam thought about Frodo all the time. When he wasn't sitting in Frodo's old room he would be going about his daily business when small things would remind him of his friend. His gardening reminded him of times they would spend together before they learnt of the ring. Market and other places around the Shire reminded him of the special times Frodo and Sam had had. Nothing he could do could make him forget. He even dreamt about Frodo and constantly worried about his new life, though he knew no harm would come to him in the undying lands. 

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You used to captivate me by your resonating light

But now I'm bound by the life you left behind

Your face it haunts by once pleasant dreams

Your voice it chase away all the sanity in me

It seemed as though the pain that he felt for Frodo would never go away. He could never imagine not missing his friend. Although Sam knew that Frodo had been planning to leave he had forced himself to keep hoping that maybe he would stay. Maybe Sam had just got it wrong and that Frodo was never going to leave him. But he did and he was gone now, forever. 

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These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just to much that time cannot erase

Sam could not forget the times they had had. The times Frodo had needed Sam and the times Sam had needed his Frodo. He wondered what life would have been like if he had never met Frodo at all. Would it have been better or worse?

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When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you scream I'd fight away all of your fears

And I've held your hand through all of these years

But you still have all of me

Sam remained on the bed telling himself over and over that Frodo was gone now and he wasn't coming back. As much as old memories haunted him he had to remember that. It was hard but Sam was no longer with his one true friend and he would have to learn to live without him. 

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I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone

And though you're still with me

I've been alone all along

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you scream I'd fight away all of your fears

And I've held your hand through all of these years

But you still have all of me

Sam let a single tear fall down his cheek and onto the bed covers before he walked from the room, closing the door behind him. 

So now here's a few replies to those who reviewed the first chappie:

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mousegal: I'm glad you liked it. It is one of my favourite songs ever and I hope the chapter did it justice. Here's the next chapter for you. 

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Yahiko : Aww Thank you. Glad you liked it and here the second chapter for you. I hope you return to review it. 

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Michelle Frodo: Glad you liked it and glad I am continuing to impress. As long as you keep reviewing I'll keep writing. I do try my best. 

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Anastasia Who: Thank you for the review and I thought it was kinda sweet too. Here's Sam's point of view for you now. 

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ElveNDestiNy: Glad you like the song. I love it. It's very beautiful. Anyway, hope you liked this chapter too. 

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Arwen : Yes I know you love this song. I hoped you liked the story too and I hope you like song equally as much. Please keep reviewing. 

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Angel of death: Aww, thank you. I'm glad you liked it and it's sometimes really hard to make words fit to the songs without making it seem corny. Anyway, hoped you liked it. 

Thank you all for reviewing and I hope you all return to review this chapter too. They all mean a lot to me and make me very happy. Thank you. 

xxx

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